Wednesday, July 3, 2013

5 Things Every Mother Must Teach Her Daughter

A mother is the first individual a daughter idolizes. As a toddler she wants to do everything that ‘mommy’ does. She wants to wear the same clothes, eat the same things, say the same words- in short as she is growing up every daughter wants to be her mother. 


As the days fade into years, a mother becomes her daughter’s friend, mentor, guide and teacher. This is a huge responsibility for a mother. She must teach her daughter all the right things. The list is long and endless. And most certainly the teaching never stops. But at the top of the list is one important lesson – It does not matter that you were not born a son. You were born an individual. And as long as there is life do things which make you feel proud of who you are.

“Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.”  ~Marion C. Garretty, quoted in A Little Spoonful of Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul

There are 5 things every mother must absolutely teach her daughter:
1.    Pride:
A mother must teach her daughter to be proud. She must share with her daughter the joy of being a woman. She must tell her daughter that being a woman is a wonderful experience. It entitles her to memories a man can never have. She can feel more passionately and deeply than a man can ever will, she has a heart which is more accepting and forgiving than that of a man, she holds within her gentle hands the strength to make and break relationships. A mother must teach her daughter that she should be proud of her strength. She should be proud to be born a woman.

2.    Follow her heart:
A mother must let her daughter know that being born a girl child is not the end, but the beginning of an exciting adventure. It is the responsibility of the mother to make her daughter realize that she has the right to choice. She must teach her daughter to listen to her heart. It is very important that a daughter understands that her dreams are not the price at which her brother, father or anybody else achieves theirs. A daughter should know that if she wants to keep someone else happy she should first have discovered the key to her own happiness. A daughter must be taught the importance of sharing, compromising and sacrifice, but she must also learn to prioritize herself every now and then.

3.    Have a voice:
Most women end up being mistreated or misunderstood because they never speak up. A mother must teach her daughter to have a voice. She needs to make her point when she feels she is being wronged or misunderstood. A daughter must be taught that all relationships are based on ‘understanding’. She must know that the secret to understanding anybody is communication. You cannot expect the world to interpret your silence the way you want to. A mother has to teach her daughter to speak up.

A daughter should be able to tell her father what makes her uncomfortable, she should be able to tell her brother she needs space, she must know it is alright for her to tell her male friends what upsets her. She needs to know it is ok to have male friends.

4.    Believe:
A mother must teach her daughter to believe in herself. She must understand it is a wonderful thing to dream and it is alright to believe in her dream. She must understand that impossible is just another word, if she believes in her own strength and potential. She must also know the importance of being different. A daughter must know that being different is not a crime. Teach her to believe in her differences. Teach her to stand out because of the good she is. Teach your daughter that if she believes in herself, people will believe in her. Teach her to never stop believing in herself and do everything with full conviction even if there is a lot of pressure.

5.    Stand Up:
A mother must teach her daughter to stand up for what is right and against what is wrong. The recent case of Nigella Lawson getting manhandled by her husband at a restaurant made headlines. Domestic abuse is very common in almost every part of the world and is not limited to only poor and illiterate women. Some of the most famous, richest and successful women have faced domestic abuse. Around 70% women in India are victims of domestic violence. It’s time to say NO to domestic abuse and stand up for your rights. Teach a daughter to never ever tolerate any kind of abuse from anyone. She must raise a voice against domestic abuse.

The world is not a bad place. It just seems sometimes seems that way. A mother must let her daughter know that she has to deal with the good and the bad. She must fight her battles. A daughter must know that her mother will always be there for her. 

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